Day 24

“The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. And that's what you've given me"

I'm not sure how or why my mind does what it does. If I could seriously figure out how to master my own mind/thoughts or if I had on on/off switch it would make my life so much easier. Seriously!

So today was another family day. It was a good day and I had a lot of fun BUT I was bombarded all day with memories of my friend and the fun things we did. It seemed like everything I did, every song that came on the radio, everything someone said, everywhere we went triggered a memory. And while I was a little sad because It reminded me that those times are over and aren't going to happen again I was also happy. Happy because those were such good times. I thoroughly enjoyed my time with him.

Now I know our friendship wasn't always the healthiest and at the end I was really crazy and not in a good place. But the good times were really good and I had a friend that loved me, believed in me and accepted me just the way I was. That kind of love is rare. And even though I turned it into something weird, and twisted, and went to a very dark crazy place I'm thankful for it. Because without this friendship I wouldn't be where I am today. I wouldn't be on this journey.

So while today was a weird intense day it made me realize just how thankful I am for the friendship. And that I'm finally to a place where memories make me happy and not devastated. This is progress!! :)